BASTARD SYSTEM MANAGER FROM HELL #14 - The Leaver Leaves.  Alive.
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I get in Tuesday just before lunch, nice and early as it's the first day of the
week.  Seems one of the lifts is not working, so I have to wait for the other
one.  When I get to the office, there is a dreadful smell lingering in the air. 
I ask around and find out that it's the Morning Operator.  Just before I sack
him someone explains that it's his body frying.  Seems the Engineers moving the
VAXes over the weekend connected the mains up to the back of the racks.  The
Morning Operator was being conscientious and decided to tidy up the racks,
shutting all the doors.  Buzzzzzzt.

Still, as I have the form out, I sack him anyway.

I settle down into my seat for a little pre-lunchion siesta, but someone has it
in for me.  There's a person in front of me who I vaguely recognise.

"Antonia from Back-office User Support / Training is leaving, here's her card."
he says.

"Are you sure she's a BUST?" I ask.  "I thought she was one of the DICS"  I
can't resist a small smirk.

"No, no, no" he replies, obviously forgetting who he is talking to.  I mark him
down for a working set of one.  "She was in Back-office Analysis Group, not the
Dealer Interface Change / Support team, now she's moved to Back-office User
Support / Training."

"So," say I savouring the moment, "she was a BAG, but now she's a BUST?"

"Exactly."  No sense of humour these back office programmers.  I sign the card
and hope he'll leave me in peace for my nap.  But no, he shoves an envelope
under my nose.  It's got money in it.  Absently I take out a twenty.  "No, no,
no, you're supposed to put money in."

"Why would I want to do that?"  The programmer looks confused, then he looks
down at the sign on my desk: 'You're on the red, fiery road to Hell.  Say hello
to Pop when you get there.'  You can see the dawn of realisation upon his face. 
Then he realises what he's said:  No, a total of six times.

"Well, anyway, I must be going."  He grabs the card and nearly trips himself up
in his race to leave.  

I pour the contents of the envelope into my whisky money tin, whilst I start
dialing the Day Operator to get his priority dropped to two.  Only two as he
did leave me seventy seven pounds and two pence, according to the sounds of the
notes and coins hitting my tin.  I wonder who put the two pence in.  Someone's
making a bid for my job.  This may need investigating.

I'm interrupted from my musing by loud cheering.  My terminal tells me that the
second lift has started working.  They'll stop cheering when the doors open
think I.  Sure enough it stops and the camera display on my screen shows what
looks like a group of horror struck lift engineers.

Just as I was getting to sleep, the damn ambulance siren wakes me up.

Then there's a knock at the door.  Before I have a chance to even finish
pouring my second scotch, the door is rudely opened.  With a smile that wide,
she can only be Antonia.  Thinks she's made it out of the company.  Alive.
She gives me a far too honest opinion of me.  Obviously she knows my
under-the-desk twelve gauge is out of shells.  I reach for the flame thrower,
but she dodges quickly out.

I decide to let her go.  After all, I always did have a soft spot for her. 
Which is very unusual for me when I see a pretty girl.